Three Wonderful Things

1. When I mess up, I feel guilty. I made a mistake...but now I know that SHAME is not from God because shame says, "I am the mistake."
Repeat: I am not a mistake. There isn't anything wrong with ME.
So practically, this means that my screw ups are forgivable, and God is free to keep teaching me...

2. Nothing Isaiah ever does will change my love for him. Not just because he's cute and I get warm fuzzies when I'm with him. I am making a CHOICE to love him, and that choice is unconditional.
However, the way he acts, what he says, how he treats me, etc. will affect how much I enjoy being with him, hanging out...etc. See what that means?
God's love for us doesn't change based on how much we obey Him or how well we love Him back. Nothing we do can change His deep, foundational love toward us!
But if we never talk to Him, disobey, etc. than this will affect our relationship for the worst. I can't really say how much God "enjoys hanging out with me" but from my parental perspective, I truly believe that His heart is touched -- either wounded or ministered to -- by our actions and choices. CrAzy!

3. Isaiah, Levi, my family, friends, chocolate, shopping, the ocean....God's been showing me how all these things are gifts for my enjoyment BUT He is for my satisfaction. Deep down, my soul satisfaction, even my most prominant daily pleasures, can only be from Him. And I'm not just speaking from a theological perspective. I FEEL the void inside of me, and when I run to gobble up a chocolate bar or watch my favorite movie, I can tell I'm just numbing the ache. And after I'm left with the candy wrapper or the rolling credits, the ache comes back and I feel like my best distractions merely scraped at the sides of my inner void.
God is just slowly teaching me this lesson, but it's such a challenge! I mean, this very moment I'm craving His presence, to be filled to overflowing with Him. I know that I really have no idea what the "pleasures of God" really entails, but I'm going after it!!